Obligatory New Year’s blog post
Benchmarks, touchstones, watermarks, anniversaries, birthdays, new years. Call it what you will, we mark time. We make resolutions. If we are good at keeping our resolutions, then it is a habit we endorse approaching it with import and reverence. If we make-and-break resolutions, anemically list out the goals and aspirations and then feebly attend to the duties and tasks required to accomplish then, then no wonder we fail.
I am not one to accept failures. And I have an abundance of goals attained, tasks accomplished, dreams made reality to attest to my tenacity and flat-out gumption.
This evidence should give me strength, affirming my foundational elements and yet, I fumble and falter. I doubt myself. I doubt my strength, my ability, my veracity. But the retrospective viewpoint dissolves those doubts. Like instant tea powder in a glass of cold water, my doubts about being able to do X, Y and Z disperse. If I want something, if it is a task to master or accomplish, I am rarely going to fail. If it is something within my purview, I can do it. I got this.
So, what is it that I wish to GET this year? I turned 50 in August. The day after my last blog post. That is a literary allegory, right? Where did my voice go? Well, maybe I needed to be quiet for a bit, recalculate my bearing and headings before moving on. Inventory and stock taking, right? I went to Paris. I climbed the Eiffel tower (well, I road the elevator to the top). But I did climb to the top of the Arch D’ Triomphe. The arch of triumph. One step at a time. Up and down. It is metaphor for all I do: one step at a time, painstaking and slow but I get it done. It isn’t elegant or pretty to watch, but then again….I am not doing it for you or anyone else. I climb for myself, for my heart and soul.
And now, I set off on this new year. I have the general shades of goals I want. They are not clearly defined – yet. But, I have intention and desire. Here I go.