This space is my cauldron, when I stir my brew and make my Happy. A simple, single stone skipped into the drink doesn’t disturb or agitate enough. In the chemistry lab, you drop a magnet into the beaker while it is heating. The magnet spins and keeps the solution combined. I need more than the single kerplunk to trigger a happy spot.
I tug and tease in this space, looking for the silver lining, the half full, the sunny side. While I would one day hope to be able to stick it perfectly with a mere flip of a switch, I am realistic. I have to work at getting to that space. And maybe only through working at it do I feel I have earned it. The instant and easy satisfaction doesn’t satisfy me much.
And while I have tried to stick to the small stone guidelines….I have had to find other means by which to engender my happier state of mind. Yet, they are not a well developed, mastered or even proven effective. And so, I floundered a bit this weekend. But, it may be the ideal time to exercise a bit of dissociation from writing in this space and doing other things.
I still totally avoided all editing. And that makes me sad and guilty. Start afresh tomorrow.