Making tea

I had this thought this morning…….”I am not making tea for Satan today.”

I know that will sound bizarre to many people, especially to most Catholics. CRAZY TALK. Now, I don’t actually see Satan. I don’t hear voices, but I know his wicked ways. The closer I am drawn to the Lord the more ferocious Satan becomes. He does not bother with people who have fallen away. But, I have tried to be a daughter of God. I have diligently surrendered to God and in doing so, I have learned that there is this divine battle for souls. 

I tend to be a pessimist. Ziggy. I have a “glass half empty” nature. I can easily get my teeth kicked in. Adversity leads to a sense that you don’t deserve any better. So, when life shows me an opportunity I am often overenthusiastic. I grasp at the slightest hope. I want so much for things to be smooth, to be happier, to “work out”.

Often, when my life starts to gel and I am in the groove, I get ambushed. I think everything is humming along and then WHAMMO, I get the wind knocked out of me…….and then that doubt creeps in.

Satan wants company. He wants me to cry. He wants me to agree that I am inadequate. He wants me to believe I can’t do things. He makes me think I am not smart enough or talented enough. I feel like I should give up because failure is coming. He wants me to quit even before I TRY.

Today, I had several situations in the pipeline that might offer real reward for me. These things came to me through providence. I could not take any credit for their existence, yet I knew they could bring tangible solutions to some problems I was facing. Then I got sideswiped. It was so unexpected. And then the doubts tumbled through my thoughts like a game of 52 card pick up.

Then came a very affirmative response to that cascade of fears, doubts, uncertainties…… “I am not making tea for Satan today.” He is really crappy company. If he is not talking about himself, he just rags on me and what I do wrong. Friends like that I do not need!!

Instead…..I just stood still and waited. I was silent. I did not look for some response. I did not defend myself. I did not bitch. I wanted to just wait and see what would happen if I had faith and let the day play itself out. I suspended judgement on myself, delaying the condemnation. And I learned that the shield of the Lord kept that prowling lion away. I was protected all day, without lifting a finger or saying a word.